Marriage Minutes
Building a Healthy Marriage One Minute at a Time
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Marriage Minute #4 24–Hour Contracts
Have you seen the movie, “50 First Dates," with Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore? I am not a huge fan of romantic comedies, but I really like this one.
It is the story of a young lady (Drew) who sustained a head injury in an auto accident on her birthday a year or two earlier. The accident completely wiped out her short-term memory so that she can no longer recall anything that has happened since that day. In her mind, every morning when she wakes up it is the same day–her birthday. Every day since she returned from the hospital her family and the local Hawaiian residents have gone to great lengths to perfectly re-enact the events of that day. Enter Adam Sandler’s character, an outsider who shows up and falls in love with her.
I won’t tell you the whole story or how it ends. Suffice it to say that Adam is faced with the challenge of having 24 hours to meet her and make her fall in love with him, and then, do it all over again tomorrow. And that is what I love about this movie!
What if we only had 24 hours to make our spouse fall in love with us? What if marriage was a whole lot of one-day contracts? What if we had to behave in such a way today so as to make our partner want to renew the contract tomorrow? What kind of impact would that have on our behavior, on how we communicate with our spouse and children, on our attitude?
Think about yesterday. At the end of the day when you were getting ready for bed, did your partner say, “You were an awesome (husband/wife) today. I am so excited about being married to you. I can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings. I definitely want to renew the contract for another day.” Or, was it more like, “What a pain in the fanny you were today. I sure hope tomorrow is better.” I think I would be a little more deliberate and a lot more careful about what I say and do.
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About the Book
Based on his thirty years “in the trenches” as a marriage therapist and the knowledge and insight he has gained from thousands of clients, Jerry Shipp has written a book of practical and, sometimes, humorous parables to help us grow deeply satisfying marriages.
In our high-tech, chaotic world where relationships are shallow and people are more connected to their devices than to each other, it is difficult to know how to create a “perfect” marriage when there are so few good examples out there. How can we create “love for a lifetime?” Everybody wants it, but so few seem to achieve it. This book will give some answers to these burning questions.
In just two minutes a day, men, you will learn: • What Eeyore, Tarzan, the Grinch, Pepe Le Pew, and Captain Picard have to say about intimate relationships, • How “Jaws,” “50 First Dates,” “Sherlock Holmes,” “Godzilla,” and “True Lies” can help you to enjoy and improve your marriage, • What “Stupidville” is and how not to go there, • The proper way to “pursue” the woman you love, and • How to overcome being a “doofus.”
Women, you will learn: • How to prevent “drift,” • What “unconditional respect,” The Law of Association, and “submission” really mean, • How to “fight” in a way that strengthens your marriage, • What ordinary things like scabs, weeds, frogs, and back doors can teach you about your marriage.
Couples, if you apply the mostly simple (but not necessarily easy) suggestions in this book, you will have created a fabulous, enduring relationship
About the Author
Jerry has been a marriage and family therapist for over 30 years. He received his master’s degree from Pepperdine University in Malibu, CA. He and his wife, Gina, have two grown children and live in Austin, Texas. He is also a published poet and song writer.