Dirty Money

Harry’s Bar in Paris is known for many things, not the least of which was the fact that it was one of Hemingway’s favorite watering holes. Unknown to most people, it was also the place where James Jesus Angleton, the CIA’s most well-known mole hunter, spent most of his time in Paris. The bar was also known for the fact that it was wholly unpretentious—dark-wood paneling scarred by years of careless drinking and walls festooned with college banners, including those from all the Ivy League schools in the United States. It was also the headquarters of the International Bar Flies, a club that could be joined simply by purchasing a tie from the bartender. Ties featuring that institution’s logo, two flies wearing top hats, were a common site in every club bar in New York and Washington, DC.

Jonathon was about to order two Bombay martinis, dry, when the bartender leaned across the bar and quietly asked him if he was Jonathon Price. Jonathon nodded, and the barkeep motioned for Jonathon and Sophia to follow him. They walked around the bar and into a short hallway. To the right was the kitchen, while to the left and front were blank, wooden walls. The bartender knocked twice on the side wall, which silently slid back, and their guide motioned for Jonathon and Sophia to go through.

They walked into a room with a small table and four chairs. In one sat an elegantly dressed, middle-aged man. The panel slid shut and the man rose, hand extended. “Hello, Jonathon. My name is Max Johnson. Welcome to my office.”

Jonathon and Sophia sat down. “Hello, Max Johnson,” said Jonathon. “This is my colleague Sophia Rostova. And to what do we owe the pleasure of your company?”

“Only time will tell whether or not my company is pleasurable,” Max said, grinning. “As to why you are here, I owe William a favor. By the way, I do offer my most sincere condolences on his passing. Having said that, he was also a miserable old prick and one of the very few people on earth who has bested me. But I do owe him a favor, which I am now going to honor.

“Before I start, however, let me say how lucky you are to have such a lovely colleague, a term I have always associated with sour-looking old men. And given my not inconsiderable experience in this regard, I’m thinking that perhaps Ms. Rostova has some unusual skills that are very different from those usually associated with ‘colleagues.’ In any event, on to business.

“First, you need to know that I am a criminal. I steal things, and I arrange transactions involving unpleasant people wanting to either purchase or sell instruments of death. I am motivated by nothing except money. I also have no scruples of any kind, except I insist that once terms are agreed, those terms are honored. Failure to honor terms is always handled swiftly and abruptly by my colleagues. As a result, please note that once we part company tonight, I will be harboring no residual goodwill toward you. Fair enough?”

Both Jonathon and Sophia nodded. It was quite refreshing to be informed of one’s standing in such a clear fashion.

Max continued. “William approached me and asked me to be alert to odd requests making the rounds in my market. Recently, one such request has come to my attention. Someone in Afghanistan wants to purchase six large cargo ships and have those ships delivered to Colombia. I happen to think this is an odd request for several reasons. First, of course, is the country of origin. Who the hell in Afghanistan needs cargo ships? Second, why do they want them in Colombia? And third, the method of payment. In my business, all but the largest transactions are made in cash. Messy and cumbersome but necessary, given the difficulties most relatively unsophisticated criminals face in having bank accounts and accessing the wire transfer system. In this case, the buyers will pay in either cash or by wire transfer. In short, this is a very odd request.”

Everyone sat very quietly when he finished. Then Jonathon asked Max if he had any ideas or clues regarding the identity of the buyer.

“I don’t. You now know everything I know, and I view my obligation to William as satisfied. You may feel welcome to leave now.”

Jonathon and Sophia had both stood up to leave when Max stopped them. “One last item,” he said. “I am fully aware of who you are and of what you are capable, Jonathon. As a result, I do not wish to have you as an enemy. We’re not pals, but you can rest assured that I won’t be discussing this conversation or you with any person for any reason. Fair enough?”

“Fair enough,” replied Jonathon. “Good evening.”

“You should also know that there are two rather shady characters waiting for you down the street. Good luck.”

Jonathon and Sophia left the room, and Jonathon discreetly gave the bartender a one-hundred-dollar tip while Sophia used the ladies room.

Just like his grandfather, thought the bartender. Very classy guys.

When Sophia reappeared, they walked onto the Rue Daunou. They could see two men standing on the street corner.

“Guns or knives,” whispered Sophia as they stood there.

“Guns, I think,” said Jonathon. “It looks like they’ve got a car waiting for them, and I would guess that unless we discourage them, we’ll be going for a car ride. Take the head shot. They’re probably wearing vests. Let’s act like we’re drunk until we get closer.

Sophia laughed a girlish laugh as the two of them staggered down the street. The men watching them obviously thought they had easy targets and very casually walked toward Jonathon and Sophia. As they got closer, Jonathon and Sophia raised their guns and shot them both in the forehead. The guns were silenced, so they made just a muffled whoosh as they were fired.

A quick search of the two corpses revealed two cell phones, two silenced Glock pistols, and the usual assortment of identification cards and papers. Jonathon and Sophia took everything, dragged the two men into a darkened alleyway, and walked back to the hotel at a brisk pace.