Sins of a Mulatto Outcast

After my confession with Ms. Loper, I told myself I will eventually confront Slick. It seems God is listening to me because I have been praying for the opportunity to get over what he tried to do to me.

Once we pick teams, I end up on the same team as Slick. I quickly protest and switch up with Red. Red, Slick, and Que will take on Grey, Tee, and I. Everyone is in shock because I give Red’s team a clear advantage. I give Red’s team an even better advantage when I tell Grey I will guard Slick instead of Red. Red is jumping up and down because he knows his team will win four out of seven easily. I do not care about winning today because this is personal.

As soon as the game starts, I immediately get physical with Slick. I am pushing him, elbowing, scratching, and taking cheap shots to the body whenever I get the opportunity. Even though Slick is the nerdy type, he is a pretty good player and no pushover.

“Why are you being so aggressive Homer?” Slick asks angrily while stopping the game.

“You know what this is about?” I yell to Slick as everyone around us is perplexed by my actions.

The first game takes forever. Every time Slick gets the ball, I am fouling the hell out of him.

“Homer calm down a bit so we can play at a better pace. You are tripping out.” Red suggests while taking a water break after the first game.

“Stay out of this because this is between Slick and I. It’s personal!” I angrily reply to Red.

When the second game starts, Slick decides he will get physical with me in return for the way I treated him in the first game. I am getting him more upset because I am not calling fouls.

“I know you love touching me. Are you getting turned on? ” I whisper to Slick while dribbling the basketball to setup a play.

I can tell he is furious.

“Do you want to touch me to like you did in your room?” I ask Slick while guarding him on defense.

After this question, he reaches his boiling point.

“Do you want me to tell your mother about smoking weed in the backyard?” Slick yells.

“Do you want me to give her the full details on what you tried to do me?” I reply.

Once again, everyone is looking on in confusion. Hamp intervenes by asking Grey to switch to defend Slick because he knows we are about to come to blows.

When play resumes, Que sets a pick on Grey forcing me to defend Slick. As Slick dribbles past me to attempt a layup, I intentionally slam my forearm into his neck forcing him backwards onto the concrete. Everyone rushes over to see if Slick is ok while he is on the pavement. While Slick is lying on the concrete, vivid details of his assault replay in my head. In these few short moments, I relive the entire event over in my mind. I infuse all the suffering, hurt, and disappointment over the last three years in my fists. My demons surface to tell me this is my chance.

As soon as Slick gets to his feet, I take all my anger out with one punch to the temple and a clean shot to the throat. Grey and Hamp immediately jump over to restrain me while Slick lays on the ground gasping for air. Due to my anger, I am able to hip toss Hamp out of my way. I do not care if he dies while lying on the pavement. I want to get on with my life. I desperately want him to suffer like I did for almost three years. Hamp tries to rough me up a bit for striking his friend, but Red and Grey immediately bring it to a halt. Grey is still upset by the punch he received when we were in the third grade. Grey tells Hamp to back off. Hamp does not pursue the issue further because he realizes he will have his hands full with Grey because he has grown taller and bigger at the age of fifteen compared to his size at eight years old. Hamp decides to focus his attention on Slick.

“Is this over? Is everything resolved between us?” Slick asks once he emerges from the pavement.

“Yes!” I reply with a tear in my eye.

With all the lawsuits today on sexual assaults, I wonder what may have occurred if I took Ms. Loper’s advice and reported the incident. I realize I could have killed Slick with the punch to the throat. Since I did not report the sexual assault, I easily could have been charged with premeditated murder. My life would have been over.

I immediately realize why wrath is considered a deadly sin. It takes over your actions causing you to lose control. However, I feel vindicated when it surfaces Slick tried to molest Boom, Red and Que. He did it the same way by gaining our parents trust and luring us into his web over time. Once I explain why my actions to the group, they all give me props for doing what they feel should have done a long time ago.

Slick is punished for his attempts on us. Though it is not a prison sentence, God carries out his reprimand. Slick never marries and stays with his parents. Slick obtains numerous degrees in various studies but turns down jobs with lucrative salaries without giving a good quality reason. Recently, I see Slick getting mail from his mail box while dropping my girls off at my mother’s house. Slick looks old and run down even though we are about ten years apart in age. The memory of what he did surfaces for a moment then dissipates as I think about my retaliation on the basketball court. I forgave Slick a long time ago. I truly let the issue go after letting out my frustrations playing basketball.

This may sound hypocritical but I am glad the Lord allowed me to lash out at Slick in the manner in which I did. I believe if I kept letting this incident fester beyond that day, I may have resorted to falling deeper into the sin of gluttony by further chemically resolving the problem. I also may have carried out taking my own life. God lifts this burden because he has a blessing ready for me to accept in the near future. I am starting High School in a few days. I am glad to have this finally behind me. I never see Hamp again after this incident. Hamp’s name is like Telly’s. No one ever mentions him; so we forget about his existence.

After unleashing my wrath on Slick, I go to Tee’s house to play video games and to calm down a bit. Tee tells his stepfather what happened in my backyard. His stepfather decides to talk to me for a moment to see if I ok from a mental aspect.

“Sir, I had to resolve this the way I did. The reason for the altercation was plaguing my judgment. It was in a sense controlling me. I do not like feeling I am not in control.” I express while intentionally trying not to give too many details. “Sometimes in life you have to pick your battles. In this particular case, you chose to end the situation the best way you needed to feel closure. Based on what you and Tee have explained to me, I think you handled yourself well.”

He is right. For the first time in three years, I feel free and alive again. This burden makes me feel as though I have been born again.

After a couple of hours, I leave Tee’s house because a storm is brewing. While walking home, lightning is getting close as the rain starts to fall. I look up to the sky for a split second to witness a grey cloud explode with the crackle of thunder and the beauty of lightning. My soul is taken on a journey through the clouds into the heart of the storm. While I am standing in the epicenter, everything around me is being washed away while I am floating in the most peaceful spot. A voice emerges telling me I am ready for the next phase in my life and something beautiful is about to enter my world.