Obamasutra

A good quote can express your thoughts most aptly; so be our guest to toss these barbs in your fight against injustice. Stay tall, and God bless your position. Here are some laughs, through tears, wise vs. otherwise, guts vs. nuts. All jokes that hit above the belt are humor; those, hitting below it are satire. I have a strong desire to express myself, despite knowing it might be best to shut up. Before, I just loved freedom of thought. Now, I wish to experience the freedom of published thought. So, save time and read my aphorisms. They contain the whole history of today’s life. “Obamasutra” is a satirical adventure under the sail of common sense on the waves of the absurdity of our reality. A satirist tries to awaken common sense among public and conscience among politicians. A Republican sees a tunnel. A Democrat sees light at the end of the tunnel. An independent sees a tunnel, light and a train. A machinist sees these three idiots sitting on the rails. A Republican is a person who believes that if one drops a slice of bread which is spread with butter on both sides, it will hang in the air not having decided on which side to fall. A Democrat is sure that having fallen on the floor, the bread will jump and fall on the floor again but on the other side. I want to wish Democrats and Republicans health and especially luck. On the “Titanic” everybody was healthy but there was no luck. Recently, my neighbor approached me with a question: “I heard on TV that the President proclaimed the recession is almost over, and that productivity is growing. Yet I am still unemployed and my refrigerator is empty!” My response: “Connect your TV to the refrigerator, but don’t rely on pie in the sky.” If your phone is disconnected, it means the phone company played a joke on you. If your lights are off, the electricians are joking. If it happens with your water, electricity, phone and gas at the same time, it means the government finally recognized your sovereignty. If the recession turned into depression and then into diarrhea, don’t despair, it will only complicate the situation. TV commercial advises: "Be bold - buy gold." Unemployed citizens sold their gold and silver, only the selling of family aluminum is left. Can a bull give milk? Can a pig fly? Can the government improve people's lives by raising taxes? When you reach into someone else’s pocket, it is a theft. When you break into someone’s home, it is a robbery. When part of the society is robbed based on social and economic principles, it is redistribution. And when people are robbed for “their benefit”, it is taxation. The President has decided to make our citizens happy with enhanced government care on April 1st. The grateful people decided to thank the government by paying taxes also on April 1st.