The Legislative Dance

Chapter 4-The Dinner Party The dinner party is in full spring. All the guys who said they would make it do. Roberta and Cynthia are there as well. Two Republicans, Marlo Winston and Seth Williamson are also present. The banker hosts, Jean Fairbanks, Executive Director and Paul Washington, the Director of Government Affairs of the Illinois Bankers Association are encouraging everyone to eat, drink and be merry. Taking members out to dinner is part of their legislative strategy and well provided for in their annual budget. The long table in a back room is full of drinks of every description from Martini’s to Rum and Coke’s. Also, three bottles of expensive wine and a bottle of Champagne are open. The antipasto has already been served along with a helping of linguini with clams, specialty of the house. The conversation which starts out quietly has become increasingly loud. Inhibitions are being cast aside. Marlo, Roberta, Jean and Cynthia are receiving a lot of sexually oriented comments which they take in stride. The place smells of the foods beings served and the small scented candles in the middle of the table. “Cynthia you look so cute tonight I may vote for your bi-lingual education bill,” Seth teases. “I am not so sure you will, but thanks for the support. A lot of my people can’t speak English yet and need to be able to communicate with the government people they need.” “A little help for these people is okay I guess, but what about all the other immigrants coming here who speak other languages. My parents didn’t speak a word of English when they got here. All they knew was Polish. Nobody passed a bill helping them out. They had to learn English or else. I worry that Hispanics will get lazy and not learn English if they can get what they need by speaking Spanish.” Ralph says with some seriousness. “Yeah,” Guy says nodding, “one ethnic group is the same as any other ethnic group to me. We all have the same nicknames and problems.” “Hey let’s lay off the ethnic stuff. We Italians have plenty to complain about in that regard, but that doesn’t mean we have to bring it up in a social gathering such as this. We are politicians. Let’s talk about politics. What about that crazy governor of ours. This state is broke and he just keeps spending money anyway,” Dominick says trying to be and act jovially. “The Governor what can I say. He takes care of his own people, certainly not mine, spends money we don’t have, gives press conferences to make himself look good, and generally does a crappy job of running the state. I supposed he looks cute to the women with his big smile, big head of hair and his Elvis impersonations, but I think he has a bunch of rocks for brains underneath it,” Guy says. “He doesn’t do anything to turn me on. His fake smile looks like one of those guys selling food processors after the late show. I bet after all that sparkle he can’t even get it up,” Jean says with a wry smile on her face. “Why Jean while I agree with you, I am a little surprised you said that. Ordinarily you don’t say personal things about us politicians. I bet I know what all the sour grapes are about. I seem to remember the governor tried to push a bill to freeze credit card interest rates. Not exactly your favorite bill,” Dominick says with a wry smile on his face. “Hey Dominick leave her alone. I happen to agree with her. He isn’t exactly the kind of guy that keeps me up at night,” Roberta says with a smile. “Roberta what kind of guy keeps you up at night, inquiring minds want to know,” Guy says. “Not Pollack’s or whatever country in that part of the world you are from that is for sure. I am Latina. I am like them swarthy and sexy like Julio Iglesias,” Roberta replies. “Me too. There is nothing like a tall, dark muscled Latino guy who knows how to woe a girl in Spanish,” Cynthia says. “I guess that leaves me out. See if I vote for your bill,” Seth says teasing Cynthia. “And me too,” Kevin adds. “Sorry English guys don’t turn me on and you weren’t going to vote for my bill anyway, same holds true for the Irish guys,” Cynthia says looking at both Seth and Kevin. “Well we certainly don’t have the right girls out with us. Romano is the only guy that would turn these girls on and he isn’t even here. How do you get lucky with girls who don’t like where you come from? Hey Seth and Kevin I am with you guys. I won’t vote for Cynthia’s bill either,” Ralph says in mock seriousness. “I drank too much wine. I came out with you guys to get some votes for my bill and all I have managed to do is lose votes. By the way, Romano is sexy but Roberta and I are too smart to fall for him. He is the kind of guy that is already on to the next girl before he even finishes seducing you,” Cynthia says a little more seriously than she intends. “Cynthia, don’t pay too much attention to these guys. I will vote for your bill and I will personally club over the head any legislators sitting here who don’t do the same. Us Mediterranean types have to stick together,” Dominick says with a twinkle in his eye. “Thanks Uncle Dominick. In all seriousness, this bill is important to Roberta and me. Our people really need the help,” Cynthia says with some passion. “Hey that still leaves us non Mediterranean guys out. Where are we supposed to get our loving,” Guy says teasing Cynthia and Roberta. “Don’t worry. I like non Mediterranean guys. If you ask me, some of those Latino guys are too slick. Dominick, of course, you are an exception,” Jean chimes in. “Jean I think you’re next banking bill is going to do just fine. The only problem is that you are married,” Ralph laments. “No problem I also like non Mediterranean guys, I am not married either,” Marlo says looking at Ralph, then Guy. “Now that is bipartisanship. What do you think Bob? You haven’t said a thing,” Guy says with a flourish. “On behalf of all non Mediterranean guys, here is a toast to Jean and Marlo,” Bob says in reply. “Hey wait a minute. Roberta and I like some Anglo guys. You are kind of cute Bob. All you need to do is learn some of the moves,” Cynthia says smiling. “Okay I will change the toast. To all the lovely ladies sitting at this table,” Bob says with a flourish raising his glass. As one they all say “cheers and salute”. After toasting, Bob notices some loud activity at another table toward the rear of the dining room. A big guy Bob believes to be a senator is drinking Dom Perginon which costs about $150 per bottle with nine other men. Each of the revelers is offering a toast and is clinking glasses with the others. As much of the champagne is being spilt as is being consumed. They also seem to be taking turns telling jokes which create another opportunity for more drinking and glass clinking. Bob believes that at least four other senators are present but he does not really know. He doesn’t recognize the remainder of the merry makers. Bob also notices bottles of Mouton Rothschild on the table which can run as high as $1000 a bottle in a restaurant depending on the year. Curious Bob turns to Gus. “Hey Gus what is going on at that table? It looks like a senator is there but I don’t recognize the rest of the people. While we are spending a few dollars here, we look like piker’s compared to them.” “Oh that is Senator Jeffrey Pulaski at the head of the table with Senators Sullivan, Touhy, O’Brien, and Vaughn. They are all city Democrats and close friends of Senator Pulaski. I am not sure but I think the rest of the men at the table are from Senator Pulaski’s ward. They are probably his precinct captains. I am pretty sure that there aren’t any lobbyists at the table at least any registered lobbyists I know.” “I realize that it is not any of my business but I have a hard time believing that one of the guys there is going to pick up that tab. I think it will be an eye popping bill when it comes.