Window Shopping

I could tell it was early morning, as my eyes were forced open by the sun. I held my head up from the bed to look at the alarm clock in the hotel room: 7:33 a.m. I had to get up soon because I promised my mom I would go to church with her if she let me keep the car until the evening. I eased out of the bed quietly to use the bathroom. When I came back, I noticed Ramsey was still asleep. I eased back into bed so that I didn’t wake him and move to lie right next to him. I watched him sleep, all peaceful and quiet. I allowed my thoughts to remember how soft his lips felt the night before. I thought about pressing my lips to his to wake him, but I hadn’t brushed my teeth yet. I realized that I really liked Ramsey a whole lot, especially after sleeping with him. Funnily enough, the one thing that made me really want to go all the way with him was that he acted as if he really wasn’t about sex. A guy who never attempted to have sex with me would get it faster than a guy who did. Ramsey was beautiful, inside and out. I recalled the first few nights we walked around campus; he told me everything about who he was, and where he came from. I kind of envied the things he was saying about how close he and his family were. He mentioned how they traveled at least once a year to his birth place in Africa, although he grew up in California. Whenever his older twin sisters came home from school, he and his younger sisters and older brother would plan a whole day to hang out together. He even told me that his mom and dad had been married since he was born, and he had never seen or heard them have a fight. I couldn’t believe it. I must have been in a really dysfunctional family compared to the way he grew up. Ramsey told me he had one serious girlfriend before college, and they broke up because of the long distance. He went on and on about all of the positive things in his life. I just listened without sharing so that I wouldn’t ruin the mood with my traumatic life story. After pondering this mysterious, optimistic guy I was slowly falling in love with, I decided I would wake Ramsey up to have sex again. I figured the previous night was great enough to go for a repeat. Besides, I didn’t know what tomorrow would bring for us. Although the sex was incredible, I wasn’t really sure how he felt about me, and I didn’t want to mistake sex for love.