Many of us were not raised to understand healthy boundaries, I was raised to get married and have kids, period. We need to educate ourselves on having solid boundaries, and if you don’t, there are many books out there that will reveal what healthy boundaries are. Unfortunately, I found out the hard way, and have realized that boundaries keep us safe. Boundaries will help you take a step back and really evaluate what you are dealing with, in order to make better choices for yourself.
So here are some things to use as a check-list:
If a man you just met is claiming he loves you after the 2nd date, and tells you, “You are the love of his life” – BEWARE!
If a man wants to move in together after 2 weeks (and you’ve seen each other everyday since you met) – BEWARE!
If a man calls or texts you 10-20 times a day, or won’t stop calling you at work – BEWARE!
If he shows up unexpectedly at your door, at your work, at your nail place (cause he knows you are getting your nails done) – BEWARE!
If he tells you to quit your job and that he will take care of you – BEWARE! (What he is really doing is getting you away from people to isolate you – even though it sounds like a great deal)
If he wants to marry you right away, and if you refuse him, then starts becoming jealous and possessive – BEWARE! (You are headed down a path of destruction, and a road full of heartache if you even think of marrying a person who is controlling, manipulative and full of anger)
These are just some things that overstep your boundaries, and if you let them continue and you let him slide, or think it is cute – you are in for an even more rude awakening, because little do you know - this person is someone that is very dependent on you, and due to that they will be hard to get rid of down the road if you are not cautious now. Yet, they are very clever and smooth, never let them fool you, they know what to do, what to say, and just when to be the perfect gentleman. It’s the art of seduction, and it is the door that you will open if you don’t set boundaries and rules up front.