Politically Correct My Ass...

...Finally, the image of the ship is something that everyone can envision in their mind…a giant vessel… built of morals, ethics and manners and loaded with a cargo of the right and the righteous, trying to navigate a course of safe passage through the stormy seas of the evil and the endless oceans of the ignorant, the stupid and the wrong. Damn! That was deep…more water talk. How in the hell am I supposed to follow that? I’ve done screwed around and upstaged myself. I am going to have to look for some outside inspiration; I think I may have sprained something with that whole image of a ship thing. I need a nap. Why in the hell do television news programs feel compelled to send someone out, along with a camera crew, into the middle of a severe thunderstorm, with its’ gale force winds, pounding rain and frequent lightning strikes, blizzard, tornado, hurricane, locust plague or whatever? More importantly in my mind, where do they find all of these dumbasses that are not only willing to go out into the middle of these dangerous, life threatening events, but they are also willing to go on television where everyone can see that they are too stupid to come in out of said adverse weather event? Then there is a bright flash close by and they spin and say something intelligent like: “Whoa, that one was close. And here we are standing here with electrical equipment of all sorts and a thirty foot metal lightening rod sticking up from the top of our mobile news room. I sure am glad it’s raining so you fine folks at home, making fun of me won’t be able to see that I just pissed my pants”. “Never order Chinese food in an American restaurant with a Mexican cook”, or is it, “never order Mexican food in a Chinese restaurant with a black cook…unless you have a craving for sweet and sour chitlin’s…with hot sauce”. Oh, what the hell. One is just as pertinent as the other, don’t you agree? Being 100+ pounds overweight does not make you handicapped; it makes you a lard ass. Get your fat ass up off of the scooters intended for the real handicapped and walk your big ass around Wal-Mart. The exercise will do you good! And, while your at it, put down those cigarettes and back your fat ass away from the buffet. “All you can eat” is not an instruction. For my part, what the hell do you want me to say? I don’t have some bull shit, liberal Democrap excuse or blame to place. I was guilty of all charges: Speeding-Guilty as charged. I was clocked doing 102 miles per hour in a 50 MPH speed zone. Reckless driving- Guilty as charged. I did flip the car. Possession of alcohol in a dry county or bootlegging, if you will- Guilty as charged. I did have alcohol in my possession, in my blood and in my mind. Failure to stop for an officer of the law- Guilty as charged. I have it on good authority that I actually sped up when I saw the blue lights. Failure to maintain proper control- Guilty as charged. The car did come to rest on its’ top, upside-down in a road side ditch, with me and my two passengers suspended upside down by the seat belts that probably saved our lives, and the song, “Trick-or-Treat” by the band “Fast Way” playing loudly…very loudly. Hey, wait a minute, this counts as another case of death being cheated, by me. Truth… The day was dark and stormy, although the sun shone bright. My beast is with me once again, to hide it from my sight. Fools and fakes and rats and snakes are everywhere, I find. The ones you trust, because you must; Fight for peace of mind. Yes, saint and dirty sinner, both master and beginner; of all I stand accused. To compound my confusion, I live integrity’s illusion; Knowing in my soul and mind that I’ll too face the truth… Kevin L. Hogan 01/03/2008 ...There were slight plumes of smoke rising from the spots on his forehead where his eyebrows had been. ...I have no desire to be a martyr; I just want to be a starter. Being a martyr sucks. They always die....