So You’re Cremated … Now What?

How do you start a book on the many ways and options you have if you decide to scatter your ashes? The subject assumes that you or someone you care about has or is considering cremation. The thought that your life will eventually have an end is something that most of us would rather postpone thinking about. But our life on earth does come to an end for all of us, and what happens after that is matter of whatever your belief system is. Maybe there’s a heaven, maybe a hell, maybe reincarnation, maybe nothing at all. If there is a heaven, you might be headed there. If you were on Santa’s naughty list, you might be headed to a hotter climate. If you have a Buddhist point of view you might believe you get another chance in your next life. Then, of course, maybe there is nothing after the lights go out. If so, there’s nothing to worry about since there will be nothing to worry about. Putting aside all these possibilities, you still need to ask yourself, “What is the last way I want to be remembered?” – along with the eloquent eulogies that will have people grabbing for wads of Kleenex® at your funeral. Most of us can agree that once our life spirit leaves our body, what is left is our body – the container we carried around for years – the one that went to school, had friends, maybe a family, went to Disneyland, had a job, and collected a lifetime of experiences, hopefully mostly good. If you are reading this book, then something about the title probably caught your eye. Maybe you are thinking ahead, deciding that cremation might be an option for you – or your loved ones. If cremation is a choice then the question is “so, you’re ashes, now what?” What you can do with your ashes as a final statement is what this book is all about – and there’s no other book like it. There are over 100 suggestions of ways that you can scatter your ashes. Some are thoughtful, some are funny. Some are truly creative, some are irreverent. What you choose can reflect your personality, a final statement you want to make, or something meaningful that puts you in the director’s chair for your final act in the play that was your life. If cremation is a considered choice, this book provides a way to start thinking and discussing this subject, especially with the ones you love. This is a book that offers some creative ideas, with a few chuckles along the way. Furthermore, for the first time you have a book that compiles most of the commercially available scattering possibilities in a single volume along some of my own suggestions. For example, did you know that you can disperse your earthly remains by being packed into fireworks, or have them shot into space, placed inside a time capsule, scattered around exotic locales anywhere in the world, turned into a real diamond, or cast into a pink flamingo lawn sculpture. So You’re Cremated -- Now What? is not a somber how-to manual. It is written with humor in a tongue in cheek style that starts out with a little history, then gives you some funeral tips along with cremation do’s and don’ts. After that, you can burn through these pages and read some sizzling ideas about what you can do with your ashes – whether scattered, buried, mailed or left outside with the recycling. Some of these ideas will have numbers following them that refer to commercially available services you can make use of, which are noted in Appendix A. And for those of you who want to be reassured that other people have chosen cremation, a list of some of our more famous predecessors are listed in Appendix B. I hope you will benefit from these thought provoking and entertaining possibilities to help you make a lasting final statement. Happy scatterings!