Caution: Nursing Home Ahead

Regarding medication, when she was relocated to the second floor and was there about two months, I visited one morning and found her sitting by the nurse station in the chair with a bib under her chin half dosing and drooling and just about out of it. I knew right away what was wrong with her. I asked the RN if she was on Haldol; she was. I told the RN I wanted my mother off the Haldol immediately. It was doctor's orders, I was told. I told her to call him and tell him I want my mother off the stuff and find something less harmful; I don't want any medication that will make her like a zombie. If she can't be like a normal person with medication, then she doesn't need anything at all. I know she runs away, but they better watch her more closely and not depend on medication to do the work for them. "The doctor may have left his office by now," the RN replied. "Call him anyway, you may catch him." As luck would have it, she said she caught him going out the door and told him Mrs. Girard didn't want her mother on Haldol. As far as I know, mother was not on anything after that and the RN's had to watch her and run after her down the hall until she could no longer run. Most doctors stay away from Haldol. I learned firsthand about Haldol as an intern before the resident started it until she died, to control her behavior. When I was working and visited mama once a week on Saturdays for a while, on one of my visits I found my mother smelling very bad. Her hair needed washing, her nails needed cutting and had stuff under them, she had very bad body odor, she needed a podiatrist badly and her chin needed shaving. In plain English, she stunk badly. When I questioned the two nurses at the desk about her last bath they said that mama doesn't want baths. "Well, then, when was the last time she had a shower?" "She didn't want a shower either," she replied. "When was the last time her body touched water and soap, because she is a stinking blob of humanity!" I was not a happy camper. "Well, we can't force her to bathe if she doesn't want to," she was a bit irritated. "Are you kidding me? She is a health hazard. She has a memory problem; she is paranoid; she is here because she needs care. If she could be taken care of at home, she would be at home. She needs to be bathed regularly like everybody else, at least twice per week, whatever regular is in this nursing home; she needs her hair washed, her chin shaved, her nails clipped, and she needs to see a podiatrist. I don't want to ever find her smelling this bad again; this is total negligence and it is unacceptable and it will be reported next time." "Do you know what it will take to get her in the tub, probably five aides!" "Well, if it takes five aides to get her clean, then get five aides to get her clean! The nursing home is getting paid for it. Eventually she will give in when she figures out she can't get out of bathing. It is a matter of outlasting her!" Well, she was not happy, but neither was I. The next time I was at the nursing home my mother was clean, nails were cut, toe nails were cut and she smelled good. On the way home the RN sarcastically said to me, "How was your mom today, did she smell good enough to you today?" Upon investigation I found mama's dress was soiled with feces, her hands were soiled as well and she had feces under her nails. Obviously it wasnot hershower day. I stripped off her clothers and gave her a washdown with a towel. She had nothing under her dress. She didn't even have her shirt and no underwear, and maybe that was good for once because her body needed to be washed. I had to wash the seat of the wheelchair as they neglected to put a pad on it. After I got her face and hands washed, her underwear on, her hair combed, her socks on, her nails cut as short as possible, I made a note to myself to check her nails every other day to keep them cutdown to the skin. Pleased? Yah, like a flea landing on flea collar! Heck no! Not when she was sitting in front of the nurse, practically in her lap, who, by the way, was drinking coffee and chatting with the guy who picks up urine samples for the lab. Are these people walking around with clothespins on their noses? The residents are sitting facing the wall just feet away and thenurses can't get their ass off the chair and turn them around in the right direction? No, she can't put a lap cover on the legs that are spread apart either? Can't she tell the aide to clean up her person for the day? Couldn't she do that much if it isn't her job to do anything at all otherwise? I could smell these people by the time I got to the desk, what is wrong with these professionals?