Prostate Problems
One Man’s Journey Through BPH
by
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I’m in tears in Dr. Tatum’s office, shedding more liquid from my eyes than I have from my penis lately, which is why I’m here. I’m feeling sorry for myself and embarrassed at this display, yet better for having had it, for admitting the increasing severity of the problem. While in denial and toughing it out with my sports mentality, refusing to go to the doctor, I would occasionally challenge myself: ‘What are you going to do, wait till you piss your pants in public?’ An act performed for the first forty-eight years of my life with the merest wisp of attention, taken totally for granted, always completed within two minutes, should not cause a problem, should be something that I, a little kid no longer, a full-fledged adult, should be able to control—easily. But I can’t. This condition intensifies my Italian inclinations to both cry and get mad. I damn myself, damn the whole dammed-up situation downriver. I’ve been flagellating myself at home, punching my chest and stomach and arms, pounding and kicking the bathroom door and walls. If you saw the anger—rage—felt the frustration and heard the swearing, you’d be afraid of me, think I’m nuts. My wife has had to talk me back on a few occasions, even threaten me with consequences--and more than once.
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About the Book
When Tony begins having trouble urinating in his late-40s, he has no idea why, and even less inkling that he’s about to become an unwilling combatant in an internal battle that will last over a decade and significantly change his life physically, psychologically, sexually, and emotionally. Firmly-held beliefs and a longstanding way of living are gradually challenged, frequently dislodged, occasionally obliterated, and ultimately transformed by Benign Prostatic Hyperplasia (BPH), which afflicts half of all men over 50. Tony becomes increasingly obsessed with his condition as it worsens, processing voluminous info about it, changing his perspective on aging, playing amateur doctor on himself with sporadic success, and using his body as an unscientific experimental lab in a constant search for answers that takes his Californian approach to life through Eastern philosophy and western medicine, natural remedies and alternative medicine, and whatever else is reputed to work. Tony’s uneven, humorous, and sometimes contentious relationship with Dr. Tatum, which fluctuates with the pendulous swings and sudden misdirections of the condition, features the interplay of an expert in urology with no personal experience and a patient who has more personal experience than he ever wanted.
About the Author
Tony Bianco was born in New Brunswick, New Jersey, and grew up in Binghamton, New York. He attended Villanova University and City College of San Francisco for one year each. He lives in San Francisco with his wife and extended family, nine people over four generations under one roof.